Are you the ‘Difficult Spouse’ ?

Unhappy coule

Real relationships are not perfect and perfect relationships are not real !!

 

It’s 5.4 minute read.

If you are a wife or husband and on many occasions you think you are disappointed because of the other…..and think the other is the ‘difficult spouse’…. then this article is for you.

I am thankful to you if you felt there is something wrong in either of the parties and the mistake can be rectified easily.

There are two types of marriages.( Marriages are made in heaven.Is itn’t ?)

1.Love marriage

2.Arranged marriage ( In most of the eastern countries )

Irrespective of the type of marriage,both the man and the woman of his love have to adjust with each other in order to be compatible.

In fact, post marriage life is full of challenges and it exposes the couple to myriads of issues.

But we all know the truth.

One day or other both the man & the woman have to face unpleasant situation of opposing & different opinions and views, in matters of their day-to-day ‘living together’

The reality of the so-called colorful future has to show its fangs,since it is waiting to strike first !

Once the misunderstanding happens and prolongs….There are two options available

  1. You decided you are not going to adjust at all…then Apply for divorce and probably matter can come to end to the mutual satisfaction,and thus ending the very discussion I am trying to make.
  2. If the above choice is not the option due to so many other pressing matters,( which is a bit lengthy topic, for some other time discussion ) and you both have to live together,and you have to go along with the spouse….thus making the ‘misunderstanding part’ useless and even unnecessary.

Why to quarrel at all in the first place ?

Now it’s time to think.

1.Realize that ‘ married happily ever after ‘ is an illusion ( Maya )
2.Understand that Wife & Husband belong to the same team and they have to work

together for the success of their married life.

“Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up.

Ecclesiastes4.9-10

3.We often hurt our spouse knowingly or unknowingly.Do you know the solution ? Ask for ‘forgiveness’ whole heartedly.

4.When Anger or Helplessness happens to one of you…just take a deep breath and allow the heated moment to pass.Don’t forget.. time’s the greatest healer.

5.Remember marriage is a vow,before God.

Now it’s time to put the following into action.

Don’t allow discord to remain ,not more than one minute,and your anger not more than a second.

Don’t be bossy and do not take one another for granted.

Respect individual feelings & make mutual adjustments

Make sincere effort to avoid jealousy and Ego & revenge,be the first to make the other win the argument.( small trick I tell you…remember whoever does most talking is the one at fault )

Don’t deprive each other of your needs just to take the revenge

Keep communicating,by which I mean try to find where exactly things are going wrong.

Constantly tell to yourself….

  • Forget & forgive,
  • I can go also wrong,
  • live & let live,
  • let us make best,out of the difficult situation,
  • I trust you.

Finally

I asked an old man “which is more important? To love or to be loved?”
Old man replied “which is more important to a bird, the left wing or the right wing?” – MarriageHumor, Instagram

A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers – Robert Quillen

A perfect marriage is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.-yourtango.com

A marriage is a like a house. When a light bulb goes out, you do not go and buy a new house, you fix the light bulb. – Happy Wives Club

Marriage is meant to keep people together, not just when things are good, but particularly when they are not. That’s why we take marriage vows, not wishes. – Ngina Otiende

 

Any thoughts on being the Difficult Spouse ?

which of the above quotes ,you think sends the perfect message ?

Thanks for being a patient reader and reaching this point.

Thank you

Philosophy Through Photography

Pixabay,Curiano.com

Sweet Melody of Friendship

Friendship Day

Friendship day is dedicated to the bond of friendship
Friendship surely enriches one’s life.
The day is to honour and celebrate Friendship.
This is the great time to let your friends know how much the mean to you.
Poems are best way to describe deep relationships. It’s perfect way of expressing the feelings
There are many things, we cannot share with our other relations in Life. And God gave us the true friends to lean on in these circumstances

Here we are dedicating this poem for the cause of True Friendship. First time collaborating with Mermaid and Anamika. Hope everyone enjoys the true spirit of Friendship…

a71eb0ca410cbd78f08960374ee90d15.gif

PTP :
Friendship is a bond of unspoken matter,
Sharing  tears and laughter,
You bring sense of humour,
Keeps my mood a zoomer.

Anamika :
When life’s troubles came calling,
And when my spirit’s kept on falling,
When I wished for a shoulder to lean on,
You came out of the blue with arms open.

images - 2019-08-04T103352.996

PTP :
You are my white house,
When I am lost in storm house,
You are just a ping away,
In my hours of May day.

Mermaid :
Are you the  one I was looking for
Who can give me the life to live,

I kept my doors open in search of someone,
Who can touch my inner soul.

Wandering here and there
I found a person after a long time,

Who stretched the  arms for me
and healed my wounded soul.

images - 2019-08-04T103443.974.jpeg

PTP :
I have your back, When you are broke,
Have mine when my sky is dark,
You make me smile,
Being lily of the Nile.

Anamika :
An unsaid word of dedication,
Becomes the unseen proof of a friend’s devotion,
It’s a bond formed with  thousands of hours,
It’s a friendship adorned like a garden full of flowers.

images - 2019-08-04T133900.384

Thanking you.

Philosophy Through Photography

Anamika is Blogging

Stressed? Think of Romantic Friendship !

Romantic Friendship

There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement and acceptance.” John Lennon

This is a 2.7 minute read.Please proceed if you can spare this much time.

Before I start the discussion,it’s better we know the definition of ‘Romantic Friendship’.

According to ‘Wikipedia’

“A romantic friendship, passionate friendship, or affectionate friendship is a very close but typically non-sexual relationship between friends,often involving a degree of physical closeness beyond that which is common in the contemporary Western Societies. It may include for example holding hands,cuddling,hugging,kissing,giving massages,  and sharing a bed, or  co-sleeping, without sexual intercourse or other physical sexual expression”

Yourdictionary.com says

“An intensely emotional love relationship between two unrelated people, in which sexuality  is unimportant and typically absent, but there is greater physical affection or poetic communication than is typical for friendship”

Can we include online Friendship ( since we are into the digital revolution with social media,online-video/chat,making new online friends etc ) into the above definitions ? I am not sure.

How nice it’s when the truly understanding relationship takes a vow, as said below !

“The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach more,that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds.And that’s what you’ve given me.That’s what I’d hoped to give you forever”  Nicholas Sparks

But then….all are not fortunate and there has to be a kind of ‘vibe’ or as some one brilliantly  coined the term ‘ Familiar vibe’,  or  Mutual ‘resonance’ between the partners or friends or relationships.Plato’s quote is apt.

“Every heart sings a song, incomplete, until another heart whispers back. Those who wish to sing always find a song. At the touch of a lover, everyone becomes a poet.” Plato.

True friends really make a big influence on their individual lives in times of stress.

And What did John Lennon Say about friendship and its impact on Life and how this true friendship keeps you smiling ?

“Count your age by friends, not years. Count your life by smiles, not tears”.

A recent study published in the journal Psychophysiology suggests that simply imagining love & support from your significant other can boost your stress management skills.Check this link.

Thinking About Partners Reduces Stress-Study

Please share your thoughts on this subject .

Thank You

Philosophy Through Photography

 

Long distance talk

Long distance talk

                                   Distance doesn’t separate people.Silence does.                                                                                          Jeff Hood

This leads me to a Question,which I am unable to decide !

Long distance relationship or short distance relationship……which is better & why ?  (couples & Friends)

Share your thoughts.

Thank you .  Philosophy Through Photography

Image source © Dr.Sridhar,2019 All Rights Reserved

Are you the ‘Difficult Spouse’ ?

Unhappy coule
Real relationships are not perfect and perfect relationships are not real !!

If you are a wife or husband and on many occasions you think you are disappointed because of the other…..and think the other is the ‘difficult spouse’…. then this article is for you.

I am thankful to you if you felt there is something wrong in either of the parties and the mistake can be rectified easily.

There are two types of marriages.( Marriages are made in heaven.Is itn’t ?)

1.Love marriage

2.Arranged marriage ( In most of the eastern countries )

Irrespective of the type of marriage,both the man and the woman of his love have to adjust with each other in order to be compatible.

In fact, post marriage life is full of challenges and it exposes the couple to myriads of issues.

But we all know the truth.

One day or other both the man & the woman have to face unpleasant situation of opposing & different opinions and views, in matters of their day-to-day ‘living together’

The reality of the so-called colourful future has to show its fangs,since it is waiting to strike first !

Once the misunderstanding happens and prolongs….There are two options available

  1. You decided you are not going to adjust at all...then Apply for divorce and probably matter can come to end to the mutual satisfaction,and thus ending the very discussion I am trying to make.
  2. If the above choice is not the option due to so many other pressing matters,( which is a bit lengthy topic, for some other time discussion ) and you both have to live together,and you have to go along with the spouse….thus making the ‘misunderstanding part’ useless and even unnecessary.

Why to quarrel at all in the first place ?

Now it’s time to think.

1.Realize that ‘ married happily ever after ‘ is an illusion ( Maya )
2.Understand that Wife & Husband belong to the same team and they have to work

together for the success of their married life.

“Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up.

Ecclesiastes4.9-10

3.We often hurt our spouse knowingly or unknowingly.Do you know the solution ? Ask for ‘forgiveness’ whole heartedly.

4.When Anger or Helplessness happens to one of you…just take a deep breath and allow the heated moment to pass.Don’t forget.. time’s the greatest healer.

5.Remember marriage is a vow,before God.

Now it’s time to put the following into action.

Don’t allow discord to remain ,not more than one minute,and your anger not more than a second.

Don’t be bossy and do not take one another for granted.

Respect individual feelings & make mutual adjustments

Make sincere effort to avoid jealousy and Ego & revenge,be the first to make the other win the argument.( small trick I tell you…remember whoever does most talking is the one at fault )

Don’t deprive each other of your needs just to take the revenge

Keep communicating,by which I mean try to find where exactly things are going wrong.

Constantly tell to yourself….

Forget & forgive,

I can go also wrong,

live & let live,

let us make best,out of the difficult situation,

I trust you.

Finally

I asked an old man “which is more important? To love or to be loved?”
Old man replied “which is more important to a bird, the left wing or the right wing?” – MarriageHumor, Instagram

A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers – Robert Quillen

A perfect marriage is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.-yourtango.com

A marriage is a like a house. When a light bulb goes out, you do not go and buy a new house, you fix the light bulb. – Happy Wives Club

Marriage is meant to keep people together, not just when things are good, but particularly when they are not. That’s why we take marriage vows, not wishes. – Ngina Otiende

 

Any thoughts on being the Difficult Spouse ?

which of the above quotes ,you thing sends the perfect message ?

Thanks for being a patient reader and reaching this point.

Pixabay,Curiano.com